7-19-17 Life in Greensboro

After 9-11 I went to work for the Federal Government. I was angry that people would use a stupid man made religion to justify killing thousands of innocent people and fellow fire fighters, EMTs, and police officers. So I wanted to be a part of something to change that and make sure that it never happened again. I don't talk much about my ex-job with TSA.  Everyone signs a non-disclosure agreement not to but I think it's ok to talk about your personal life in relation to your job. We were stilling living in Valdese at the time we had just built a new house several years earlier on the old home place. I had been working at American Homepatient as a warehouse manager, Frye Regional Medical Center as a security officer, Valdese Fire Dept as a volunteer firefighter, medical responder, and going to Gaston College at night. Shirley was happy in her own little world I wasn't around very much.After the government hired me for the Greensboro airport I drove back and forth every day seven days a week for about six months. I started out working the second shift which was noon until closing which could be 10 pm or maybe even as late as 1 or 2 am depending on if you have late flights or not.After six months I had enough and came home one day and announced that we were moving to Greensboro.Shirley was devastated. This was our dream home. We had sat down and designed it ourselves the way we wanted it to be. Stained glass windows, open living area, skylights, I had a skylight in the bedroom where I could look up at night at the moon and stars. It was so cool. She had a huge bathroom with a Jacuzzi tub and an enclosed sunroom. She loved it and it was my worst fucking nightmare. we built it so that we could be close to mom and take care of her. She decided she didn't want that so the state took her away. After that, the house didn't mean anything to me.So we moved out of our dream home into a one-bed apartment in Greensboro. I never cared for Greensboro.It was a little city trying to be a big one. For the first three years, I worked on the floor screening passengers then a collateral duty position opened up and I was chosen for it.It was basically doing all the crap jobs that the important people couldn't be bothered to do.You had to be good at multi tasking and I was because I was in a manic stage and was driven to always be doing several things at the same time. The Security Director told me to slow down and relax I was on government time now. I just laughed. He was really a nice man deep down. He tried to be a hardass but he always treated me decently. One Thanksgiving he brought in dinner for his staff. I don't know if anyone else thanked him but I was moved by his gesture and wrote him an email thanking him for taking time away from his family to do that. He always reminded me of George Jefferson of the Jeffersons in a good way. The last couple years that I was there turned dark for me. So many things in life had happened. Shirley almost died a couple of times, David died, Mom died, Shirley's mom died, Gismo died, I had been in the hospital a couple of times. Shirley had lost her sight and I was working two jobs now TSA during the week and Well Springs on the weekends. I  was always tired and moody. Shirley said I was an asshole and that was probably true.Some days I would go to work take a government vehicle and just go park somewhere in a parking lot and just sit for hours. I couldn't make myself do anything. I was just in a deep dark hole with no way out.I kept everything hidden until the last year when I returned to the floor to work. I couldn't hide it anymore so I walked into the Security Director's office one day and told him That I was unfit for duty. I applied for early medical retirement and I went away quietly. There were some really fine people that I worked with. Some of them are still friends and I value their friendship. I don't regret my time in Greensboro as it was a learnig experence in life as all things are.