8-11-17 Crash and Burn

Well I crashed and hit the wall I didn't burn but the crash is bad enough.I haven't spoken ten words today verbally. There's nothing to say. The one thing in life I want God won't give it to me. Peace, that's all I want. Why do you make me fight a daily battle in a war that I can't win?What more do you want from me that I haven't already given you? Do you enjoy watching me suffer?Why in the hell do you make me stay here? Why won't you let me come home?I don't have anything else to give to you. Do you want me to die for you publicly?Is that my purpose to make a stand and die for you like your son did for us? All I hear is silence from you. Damn it talk to me.Tell me what you want from me.You created me I didn't ask you to. You've broken me do you see me crying take a good look.My heart is broken.Take a good look at what your creation has turned into. I should hate you for what you've let me endure. I have turned my back on you from time to time but I always come crawling back. Do you not know that all I want is to be with you. I need you.I need to fill the big empty hole of my life. I need you to take away the pain and the tears. Are you listening to me? I know you can see my heart and soul. Peace, is that too much to ask for?

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